Leave the past where it belongs

Dealing with the past of your partner is unhealthy — after all, you are not the same person you once were, right? That’s why healing from it is of the utmost importance before starting a new relationship.

The individual past of you and your partner should remain untouched. Even sharing it out of trust isn’t always wise, because it should never be used against you. That old version of you is basically dead. Silence, in this case, is key.

Everyone has a history, because each of us had to walk a unique path to arrive where we are today — and no one’s path should be judged.

There’s also a big difference between someone hearing about your past and actually living through it from your perspective. Not everyone is built for the storms you’ve endured. God never places a weight on your shoulders that you cannot carry — but for someone else, walking in your shoes might have been fatal.

So ask yourself: does sharing your past truly benefit anyone? Or is it wiser to focus on building from the present toward a brighter future?

— David John